Innocence

When do we lose the will to be kids?

I remember when I was younger, all I wanted was to be older so I could finally have the freedom to do anything I wanted. I could go play on the swings or stay up late watching TV or swim by myself or any myriad of things. I wanted to be an adult for those freedoms.

While I know that being an adult doesn’t necessarily translate into the word, “freedom” (one word that jumps immediately to mind is actually “responsibilities”), there are certain freedoms I think adults deny themselves. Like, perhaps, the right to be a kid once in a while.

I don’t know when it happened for me. Maybe sometime in elementary school I started to think it was more important to be “cool” and “popular” than playful and silly. But… isn’t playful and silly the basic essence of being a kid? Isn’t that what we strive to recreate in our lives as adults?

I choose to believe in Santa Claus at Christmastime. I choose to love Christmas carols and baking cookies and decorating the tree and the apartment. I choose to cook a fancy dinner on Christmas Day and to spend time with my family, just being. I sing as loudly as I can. I wear aprons and stupid hats. I cheer when asked. I color things and do origami and make colored paper chains. I get my photo taken with Santa. And I love every minute of it.

It’s my way of creating the magic I remember when I was a kid. And I plan to use my adult freedom to keep it going long after Christmas is over. Somehow.

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8 responses to “Innocence

  • shari/eclectic

    Good for you, Caitlin! I was just discussing Santa and the magic with our 4 year-old this morning. He wondered why Santa was at the mall when he should be feeding the reindeer at the North Pole. I haven’t enjoyed a conversation that much in a long time!

  • shari/eclectic

    Good for you, Caitlin! I was just discussing Santa and the magic with our 4 year-old this morning. He wondered why Santa was at the mall when he should be feeding the reindeer at the North Pole. I haven’t enjoyed a conversation that much in a long time!

  • karen

    Oh, to be a little kid again. Or even have one. (Once they hit double digits, it’s not the same anymore.)

  • karen

    Oh, to be a little kid again. Or even have one. (Once they hit double digits, it’s not the same anymore.)

  • toadman

    I love using Santa and Christmastime to elicit good behavior out of my kids.. and myself.

    good afternoon Caitlin…

  • toadman

    I love using Santa and Christmastime to elicit good behavior out of my kids.. and myself.

    good afternoon Caitlin…

  • Moo

    I had a couple of conversations about being kids a month or two ago. We talked a bit about believing in super-heroes, good over evil, magic, extraordinary abilities…

    We become disillusioned as we grow up. Reality sets in. Fairies, dragons, wizards are replaced by a 9-5 job.

    But once in a while as I savor a cup of hot chocolate or some ice cream or re-watch the Star Wars that I fell in love with as a kid, I get swept up again and I remember a simpler time not so long ago.

  • Moo

    I had a couple of conversations about being kids a month or two ago. We talked a bit about believing in super-heroes, good over evil, magic, extraordinary abilities…

    We become disillusioned as we grow up. Reality sets in. Fairies, dragons, wizards are replaced by a 9-5 job.

    But once in a while as I savor a cup of hot chocolate or some ice cream or re-watch the Star Wars that I fell in love with as a kid, I get swept up again and I remember a simpler time not so long ago.

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